There was no heartbeat today at my ultrasound.
My clinic is going to schedule a D&C this week.
**My D&C is this Wednesday, April 27th. I am so thankful they are getting me in so soon.**
Showing posts with label bad news. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bad news. Show all posts
Monday, April 25, 2011
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
If it Weren't for Bad News, There Would be No News
Warning: I curse at the end of this post. Offended? Don't read.
Last night, I ran a fever. Out of concern, I called the RE's office and let them know. Of course, they wanted me to come in so they could take a look. The good news? RE thinks that the fever is viral and that it would pass within a day or two.
Bad news: Fetal heart rate was down to 97. Monday it was 103. RE is "concerned". Says time will tell and we will recheck on Monday. He also marked my check-out sheet "high risk pregnancy" for the first time ever and I found the reason why on Dr. Google.
http://radiology.rsna.org/content/236/2/643.full
Don't feel like reading it? Here is the gist. In 300 pregnancies where a low embryonic heart rate was found at 6-7 weeks (low = 100 bpm or less at 6.3 - 7.0 weeks), 188 or 60.6% ended before the first trimester was over. Many ended within a week. (As in, go back for recheck and find out that fetal cardiac activity had ceased.)
I fall into this category. Yay! Can't wait to go in on Monday and see whether or not my baby died. And the best part? Even if the heart rate recovers, my chances of "first trimester demise" are still 25% higher than most pregnancies.
Fuck you IVF. Fuck the last 3 months of my life and all the hope I had that this bullshit would work, too.
Last night, I ran a fever. Out of concern, I called the RE's office and let them know. Of course, they wanted me to come in so they could take a look. The good news? RE thinks that the fever is viral and that it would pass within a day or two.
Bad news: Fetal heart rate was down to 97. Monday it was 103. RE is "concerned". Says time will tell and we will recheck on Monday. He also marked my check-out sheet "high risk pregnancy" for the first time ever and I found the reason why on Dr. Google.
http://radiology.rsna.org/content/236/2/643.full
Don't feel like reading it? Here is the gist. In 300 pregnancies where a low embryonic heart rate was found at 6-7 weeks (low = 100 bpm or less at 6.3 - 7.0 weeks), 188 or 60.6% ended before the first trimester was over. Many ended within a week. (As in, go back for recheck and find out that fetal cardiac activity had ceased.)
I fall into this category. Yay! Can't wait to go in on Monday and see whether or not my baby died. And the best part? Even if the heart rate recovers, my chances of "first trimester demise" are still 25% higher than most pregnancies.
Fuck you IVF. Fuck the last 3 months of my life and all the hope I had that this bullshit would work, too.
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Monday, March 28, 2011
Beta Hell
My beta was 32.
I have to go back in on Wednesday to have my numbers rechecked.
They wanted them to be above 50.
This is what they call beta hell.
I am in it.
I have to go back in on Wednesday to have my numbers rechecked.
They wanted them to be above 50.
This is what they call beta hell.
I am in it.
Thursday, January 13, 2011
the results are in
The nurse from my RE's office called with the results of DH's semen analysis. They are as follows:
Count: 14.9 million/mL (Normal is 20 million/mL)
Motility: 46.2% (Normal is 50% or more)
Morphology: There were no morphology results and the nurse was waiting for the lab to call her back and explain why.
Antisperm Antibody: 48% tested positive for Direct IGG antibodies
58.8% tested positive for Direct IGA antibodies
0% tested positive for Indirect IGG and IGA antibodies
We will never conceive a child naturally. We have an appointment Monday afternoon to discuss the results and ouroptions option. IVF with ICSI.
I am numb.
I am angry.
I have never felt more regret than I do right now. We should have never been so stupid to think that a vasectomy reversal would mean that we could have a child.
Count: 14.9 million/mL (Normal is 20 million/mL)
Motility: 46.2% (Normal is 50% or more)
Morphology: There were no morphology results and the nurse was waiting for the lab to call her back and explain why.
Antisperm Antibody: 48% tested positive for Direct IGG antibodies
58.8% tested positive for Direct IGA antibodies
0% tested positive for Indirect IGG and IGA antibodies
We will never conceive a child naturally. We have an appointment Monday afternoon to discuss the results and our
I am numb.
I am angry.
I have never felt more regret than I do right now. We should have never been so stupid to think that a vasectomy reversal would mean that we could have a child.
Sunday, January 9, 2011
Post-Coital Update
They were all dead.
I don't understand why for every ounce of hope and happiness I've felt of late, a full pound of despair and sadness accompanies.
I don't understand why for every ounce of hope and happiness I've felt of late, a full pound of despair and sadness accompanies.
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