Wednesday, June 22, 2011

"Everybody's Got Plans....Until They Get Hit"

It's a rarity that I'll quote Mike Tyson, but how true are those words? It seems that everyone makes plans - it's a part of life - but no one plans on the "hit" that derails it all.  Well, our plan was to have a baby and complete our family. Part of the plan, although unplanned, was IVF. The hit was the miscarriage. Part of me is still reeling from it all. Part of me is hopeful enough to try again. Part of me never wants to risk it in case it ends the same way. All of me is too scared right now to make "those types" of plans.

So, here we find ourselves with no real plans to move forward in TTC. We won't even pretend that we're trying naturally. I know that within a few minutes of leaving DH's body all of his sperm clump together and die. And I've heard the, "It only takes one" line of reasoning. I don't subscribe to fantasy. I'll sooner be licked by a unicorn than conceive a baby the old-fashioned way.

So what can Aub do? Aub can get the hell out of Oklahoma for a while. Next week the boys, the dog, and your truly will travel 1000 miles over a period of two days back to West Virginia for the whole month of July. DH will join us mid-month and that's when we will make our way to the Big Island to celebrate ten wonderful years together. I can't believe it. Seems like just yesterday we were talking over dinner (a blind date!) and here we are.  Ten years, eight moves, two beautiful boys, millions of laughs, and thousands of tears later, our story reaches a milestone. I couldn't have picked a better person to share the novel of my life with. I am a lucky girl!

Those are our immediate plans. I cannot wait to get back to the place that refreshes and recharges me. I know it will be hard to see my family and the few friends of mine who knew about the baby; I am sure it will be grieved again. I cannot think of a better place, however, to move forward, move on, and find the strength and determination to keep fighting for what my heart has decided is already mine, than in the mountains of my home.

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Welcome to the New Blog !!

This design may (or may not) stick. Now that I actually know how to do a design (template and header that is!) I may change it around some until it is just right, but the hearts are staying - one way or another. It feels good to have a change. New season, new blog, new me? Maybe!

I think I'm going to host a giveaway!  I knew not everyone would follow me to my new blog and I'm completely okay with it, but I think once I get to 25 "sweethearts" I'll shower you with appreciation via gifts.  This will take place very soon, within the next week. More details soon!

So, what's new? I've been a horrible blog follower of late. I promise to catch up!  As for me, I've been doing good. Experienced my first CD1 post-miscarriage on 6/2 and then I believe I turned around and ovulated the next week. No joke. I can feel AF coming again and I'm only on CD 20.  We really aren't even trying naturally right now. DH was out of town for my spontaneous ovulation. Instead, we are enjoying no-strings-attached bedroom shenanigans. I can't even tell you how nice it is to do it for the sake of doing it. I feel like I'm twenty.

In other news, and there's a lot of it, I am back to running and getting into shape! I've lost four pounds (whoop!) and am feeling really good physically. I have two solid running partners and all the support from my hubby that I could want. It's been great to focus on what I can do (run ten miles) as opposed to what I cannot do (conceive a baby naturally). Go me!

I have so much more to tell you all - lots of plans are shaping up for us - and Hawaii is in three weeks! I don't want to be all drawn out and blahbitty blah blah, though, so I'll save it for tomorrow.

I've missed this!!