Thursday, December 23, 2010

Football and Babies Part Two

So, I've made it abundantly clear that my RE is the guy for me and if you missed that just click here. He made such a great impression before we even discussed my situation and possible treatment.  It could not have gone better! Then again, maybe I had my mind made up that it was going to be so bad that it just ended up being not as bad as I imagined. :) Who cares about the why and the how? I feel good. That's all that counts. 

Back to the appointment, when it did come time to put me in a test tube and study me he gave me the news: I'm not infertile. That was good and bad to hear. "Yay! I'm not infertile" "Wait, are you going to tell me to leave?"  Fortunately, I was able to enjoy the good news without being kicked out on my hiney.  I'm not infertile because we haven't been trying for a year. This I knew. It's been almost a year, but we're not there yet. So what now?  Being the prepared and informed patient that I knew I would be (with a little help from a good friend), I showed him all the data I had collected.  He told me my periods are all over the place. (Yeah, I know.) He told me I'm not ovulating regularly.  (Yeah, I had a feeling.) He told me he could help. (Now we're talking, doc.)

After ordering me some tests for my thyroid and prolactin levels, he recommended that we wait for AF to arrive and then schedule an ultrasound for CD 3.  He wants to check for cysts and "obstructions" and basically anything that he feels will keep me from conceiving.  At that point, he'll also test my FSH levels to see if they're within "normal" range.  We already cleared DH as a possible reason for conception failure. The answer lies somewhere in my lower abdominal cavity. We just need to pinpoint what exactly has gone whack with my plumbing. If everything is good with the u/s, he recommended a 5 day rx for either Clomid or Femara, my choice (I'm leaning toward the Femara) CDs 5-9.  Then we'll regroup for an u/s to count and measure my follicles.  He strongly encouraged DH and I to discuss and plan for the possibility of multiples and if that's NOT what we want, we'll go a different route steering away from fertility medications.

So much to think about after my appointment that my head was dancing with visions of condom-covered ultrasound wands and potholder-covered stirrups.  All joking aside, I felt great. I felt relieved. I felt a sense of peace for the first time in a really long time. It was so hard for me to come around to the idea of getting help, but the feeling of contentment as I left with my stack of reading material in hand was a welcome change and a definite step in the right direction.  When I discussed it all with DH, he agreed that this is the way to go for now. He's a very results-driven person like me and if doing the same thing month after month isn't getting desired results, choosing to do something different is the right thing to do. Love him for that!

What I didn't care for much was his reaction to the various due dates I threw his way.  ME - "If we were to get pregnant on the first cycle, the baby would be due in late September/early October."  DH - "Let me check the WVU Football schedule and see if that works. (checks) I don't know about that. I really want to fly back for the LSU game." LOL...he's crazy on all counts. I think/know/hope being here with me and our new baby would trump any West Virginia game, but I try not to make him choose between me and his college football team too much. Saves me from feeling disappointed. :)

What I learned from taking this smallish big step is this: Struggling to get pregnant was consuming me. This appointment gave me my focus back.  I realize I can concentrate on my family AND make a baby, too. I don't have to choose anymore!  I can give everyone the attention they need and deserve because there's a hand being extended to me that I believe can help make it all happen.  My outlook has improved dramatically. The cup may still be half empty, but it's not shattered on the floor with me standing in the broken glass. That's an improvement!  So here's to 2011 and baby making! May my due date not coincide with West Virginia Football!

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